Matric Criminology Exam

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MARKS AVAILABLE: 100
TIME: 3 HOURS

INSTRUCTIONS:

A. YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS HAVE EXPERIENCE AND CAN HELP YOU WITH PRACS.
B. YOU WISH TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SOCIETY'S MALADIES AND THEIR PREVENTION.
C. YOU WISH TO BECOME A CRIMINAL.
D. YOU WISH TO SURVIVE A FEW MORE YEARS IN GAUTENG.

"Hello, good morning and thank you, please
Wind down your window and give me your keys
Now put up your hands as I open the door
Of your luxury vehicle or your 4 X 4"
-Leon Schuster

-FOR THE EXAM, PLEASE TURN OVER-

SECTION A: GENERAL

1. ARRANGE THE FOLLOWING NAMES INTO THE CORRECT ORDER, FROM THE
MOST LIKELY CRIMINAL TO THE LEAST LIKELY. WRITE THE LETTERS ONLY.

Visagie, Abdurahman, Price, Moodley, Sijeji, Ginsberg, Pioli

2. ARRANGE THE FOLLOWING IN DESCENDING ORDER OF DELINQUENCY.

J-P de Villiers, Alex Kelsall, Ian Brough, PW Botha, Deane Bussey, Adiel Isaacs, Bruce Robinson, Jonothan Cockburn, Richard Asher, Grant Sakinovsky, Winnie Mandela, Scott Lowry, Kyle Rinquest,
Gary Butcher, Cuan Cammilleri, David Roos, Yacoeb Ganief,
John Gibbon, Robert Mugabe

3. ARRANGE IN ORDER FROM GOODEST TO BADDEST.

Judge, Hardened Serial Killer, Policewoman, Victim, Lawyer

4. IF A CRIMINAL IS CAUGHT AND CONVICTED, THE LIKELY RESULT IS?

A) Jail sentence, fines, community service and/or alienation and ostracisation from society.
B) He is not allowed to pass Go or collect R200.
C) He is considered for a cabinet position.
D) He is given a free pension and monthly subscription to Huisgenoot.

5. WHEN SERVING TIME IN A CORRECTIONAL FACILITY, A CRIMINAL IS MOST LIKELY TO?

A) Be counselled in order for a smooth and successful re-entry to society.
B) Get innovative ideas from his new-found colleagues.
C) Form new allegiances and get a new tattoo
D) Rot slowly from the inside out
E) Wither away in abject misery

6. A CORRECTIONAL INSTITUTION IS?

A) Varsity college
B) Bishops
C) Where they mark your exam papers
D) A horrible place with bars.

7. WHICH OF THESE IS NOT ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOUR?

A) Subordination within the gang structure
B) Withdrawing money from the bank with your ATM card
C) Withdrawing money from the bank with somebody else's ATM card
D) Returning a lost ATM card to the bank

8. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOUR?

A) Bludgeoning a passerby on the head with a spade, in order to procure his Rolux watch
B) Using a cell phone on the highway
C) Lighting up a riefer in the cinema
D) Lighting up a cigarette in the cinema
E) Reporting misdemeanours to the police

9. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOST LIKELY SUGGESTS A LIFE OF CRIME?

A) Finishing bottom of the class in pre-school
B) Expulsion from numerous reformatories before grade 8
C) Bunking tennisette practice
D) Being lactose intolerant
E) Making free phone calls from ATM machines

10. The following description was given by an eye witness of an armed robbery. "Male, carrying cell phone. 6'1", noticeably yelling 'Pleeeeeease'. Suspect appeared to be wearing a Manchester United jersey, complaining about his service provider and eating a personalised McDonald's burger". What "getaway" car was he driving?

A) HI ACE mini bus
B) Datsun Pulsar (with dropped suspension and tinted windows)
C) 50 tonne road train
D) Hyundai Elantra

11. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING HAS ANY REASON TO RESORT TO A LIFE OF CRIME?

A) Pope Gregory IX
B) Bill Gates
C) Ernie Els
D) None of the above

12. IS THIS LEGAL? (This is a YES/NO section. Circle the correct answer.)

12.1 Driving at 220km/h on any South African road. YES/NO
12.2 Bribing a traffic official when confronted with a hefty fine. YES/NO
12.3 Purposefully dropping bricks from scaffolding onto the painters below, who ARE wearing
hard hats, and carrying buckets of paint. YES/NO
12.4 Being a criminal in principle, but abstaining from crime. YES/NO

13. WRITE FIVE SENTENCES ON WHY A QUALITY TERTIARY EDUCATION WILL HELP
YOU AVOID THE CRIMINAL LIFE. (By "tertiary, we imply university or technikon. NOT
Varsity College)

14. MATCH THE LIST OF NAMES WITH THE LIST OF WEAPONS.

15. READ THE FOLLOWING STORY AND ANSWER THE QUESTIONS:

One day, Oliver lost all his National Geographics. Oliver had a vast collection of these famous magazines. He owned every one dating back to 1712, with the exception of September 1974, which, agonisingly, his mother had sold in a jumble sale. Oliver had been immensely proud of his collection, and was inconsolable. He longed to catch the thief. Several days later, a yellow-haired individual named Seymour was observed standing on the roof of the Town Hall with a loudspeaker, letting all and sundry know that National Geographics were the Key to the Future, whilst intermittently fuelling a large bonfire with Blood Sword books. Those with keener vision also noticed a yellowish pile of magazines that was obscuring the view of the mountain. Seymour was raving about how he was a dealer in Knowledge, and was stealing from the rich to give to the poor. He was arrested by the police helicopter team just as he was about to hurl down armfuls of
magazines to the Greenmarket Square vagrants.

15.1 Who is guilty of stealing Oliver's magazines?
15.2 Given the extensive live television coverage of the incident, is the evidence conclusive?
15.3 Do you think that Seymour could have carried the magazines to the roof without the help of
his numerous offspring? Use the method of Common Sense.
15.4 Who in the story has a screw loose?

SECTION B: HIJACKING. RECOMMENDED FOR BORN-AND-BRED GAUTENG CANDIDATES.

1. What is the best word to describe a person who approaches your car window and waves a gun at you. Choose only from the options below.

A) Nigerian
B) Daisy picker
C) Ronald de Boer
D) Hijacker

2. Arrange in order of effectiveness in making a hijacker leave you alone.

"Nee ek is ou Leon"; "Oh sod off"; "Musa ukundibulela"; "Nid gobble hic flappo gorenoues"

3. Imagine (if necessary) that you are a criminal. Would you consider hijacking a road train? Justify your answer.

4. Gilbert, Frederick and Phillip used to play together as children. Gilbert used to love having car races with his toy cars. One of them was called Blue Shark and the other was called Piranha. Gilbert would invite Philip around every Saturday, and they would play for hours on end. They would never invite Frederick, because he had once taken the cars as he was about to leave, and hidden them in his sock-drawer at home. Phil and Gil were livid when they found out, and ever since that day, Fred had been excluded from their activities. Spiteful Fred grew up a lonely and frustrated child as a result of this, whilst Phillip and Gilbert are qualified as lawyer and CA respectively, both happily married with adorable families. Fred, still paying the price for his misdemeanour, lives alone in an untidy flat in Yeoville and sticks pins into wax models of the Blue Shark, Fred, Piranha and Phillip. Drawing on what you have learnt in case studies of hijacker personality profiles, which of the three is most likely to hijack a car within the next six weeks?

5. You are at a traffic light in a dark suburb and there is not a car in sight. The light has just turned green when an unmasked fellow approaches the car, waves a blowtorch at you and demands your keys. Do you?

A) Wind down your window and say "Thanks, I needed a light."
B) Say, "Hey…..Vern! Don't you remember? We were in Standard three together!"
C) Laugh at the man for his stupidity in hijacking you when you can get away.
D) Engage first gear, drive away with tyres smoking, and don't stop till you reach Swaziland.

6. You are a clever hijacker. Instead of threatening people at traffic lights, you decide to centralise your operation by opening a service station and threaten customers with lethal windscreen-cleaners. What is the major flaw in this plan?

A) Your station will soon acquire a reputation, and customers will avoid it.
B) People will stop and stare.
C) You will be the laughing stock of all hijackers.
D) Nobody will take you seriously
E) All of the above

7. Where is the most likely place to get hijacked?

A) Chipping Norton, Cornwall
B) Sleepy Hollow, Wisconsin
C) Eternal Peace Monastery, Nepal
D) Hillbrow at 3am

8. Which is not a good way to avoid being hijacked?

A) Get a license plate reading "DP-VIP-GP"
B) Ensure your car is stocked only with "Beste van Noot vir Noot" CD's
C) Ignore all traffic lights
D) Ask the shifty, suspicious-looking character on the pavement if he knows the time.

SECTION C: ARMED ROBBERY

1. An armed robber is?

A) A hijacker with no arms.
B) A robber with no legs
C) A man with rubber arms
D) A robber with two legs and two arms
E) Stealing from the army
F) None of the above

2.True or False?

2.1 Robbing a flower-shop is infinitely nicer than robbing a bank
2.2 Most banks are equipped with surveillance cameras
2.3 Geese always fly in a southerly direction
2.4 Armed robbery is invariably a team effort
2.5 YOU aspire to become a dangerous armed robber
2.6 The security guard is on the robber's side
2.7 Many people live in fear of armed robberies
2.8 Armed robbery is Not Very Nice
2.9 Armed robbers often end up in jail
2.10 It's probably cleverer to wear a mask and gloves when burgling a house

3. Which is the easiest robbery?

A) Breaking into the White House
B) Stealing the minutes of the last ten annual Baboons Anonymous AGM's
C) Looting the lower reaches of a goldmine after hours
D) Holding up a teddy bear picnic

4. Which is a good way to get robbed?

A) Hire a security guard
B) Wander through Manenberg waving R20 notes in the air
C) Enter the Around Alone yacht race, during which you won't meet anyone for a year
D) Don't shower for ten years

5. Daylight Robbery is most likely to occur at?

A) 2pm
B) 10pm
C) 2am in summer
D) The Tax Office
E) A and D above

6. As a joke, Kobus Malan and John "Pampoenkop" de Villiers walked into a shop and and "held it up" with water pistols, one of which was fashioned from licquorice. One of the customers, taking the situation to be a real robbery, died of a heart attack on the spot. Answer the following comprehension questions:

6.1 Give one reason why this "robbery" was a stupid idea
6.2 Suggest a name for the client who died. A first name and a surname will do.
6.3 Would it have been excusable had they been carrying real weapons?
6.4 Who are the two biggest idiots in the world?

8. Which is most dangerous?

A) Finny's driving
B) Strong Horse Tea
C) Avocado Pear
D) Nuclear Missile

SECTION D: CRIME PREVENTION

COMPULSORY

CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING ESSAY TOPICS. WRITE ABOUT 100 WORDS.

1. You are a security guard. Your job is to stand around outside the door of a bank and wait
for trouble to happen. Write a diary entry of your day's work. Use your imagination.

2. You are Minister of Safety and Security. You have the chief of police in your office, and a highly dedicated and uncorrupt team of helpers. The budget has just been announced, and 90% has been allocated to security. You have been instructed to rid the country of crime. Police morale is at a low ebb, the people are up in arms and your country place has just been burgled. Bombs are going off as often as car alarms, whilst burglaries go unnoticed by their recipients. The police need vehicles, equipment, uniforms and Wynberg Police Station needs a lick of paint and a boiler. Write down some of the ideas on how you will spend your money.

3. There is a new bill being drafted that will suggest that juvenile delinquents, instead of being sent to reformatories, will now be sent to top-class private schools with extensive bursaries.
Do you see this as a good, fair plan? Justify your answer.

4. With reference to any experience you or your peers may have had of crime, write an essay
that explains the pitfalls of life in Gauteng, and how things may be improved. You will NOT
receive any marks for writing "Hang the bastards" 33 times. Try to avoid racial slurs.

5. "The modern delinquent typically suffers from brutally low self-esteem, comes from a
working-class background and wishes to uplift his social status by the only means available to him." Discuss this statement with reference to the Marxist notion of "false-consciousness", as well as it's current credibility in contemporary political philosophy.


THE END-CONGRATULATIONS-TRAVEL HOME SAFELY

Handguns will be returned as you leave the exam venue.

By Richard Asher and Bruce Robinson. Dedicated to Iraçema.© 2000